To P.A.V.E. the way - Building Leadership & Activism; and the money issue
by Mark Henkel on Saturday, April 10, 2010 at 9:20am
There are many good Facebook Fans here who are not Members of the TruthBearer.org organization. Some might not even be Christian Polygamists but could very well be supporters of the polygamy rights movement elsewhere, such as being members of 2Wives.com which also supports polygamy rights. There also may be many people who have not yet made such support, but who might otherwise be so willing.
Sometimes, people wonder why the "money issue" is so important to real activism. A year and a half ago on August 20 (the day after Polygamy Day 8), I made a post in the TruthBearer.org organization for all the fellow paying Members. While its content was specifically addressed to the Members who are Christian Polygamists (so everyone here should read this while understanding that context), the message of its content can apply across all forms of polygamy rights supporters. That is, even for non-Christian Facebook Fans here, the concept of this P.A.V.E. system still applies for all real activists, even if not from the specifically Christian perspective. (So even if you are not a Christian, please do read the overall message of this piece within the context of all support and activism overall, even beyond Christian Polygamy. In addition to the community's 2Wives.com way and the Pro-Polygamy.NET way to support without being a Christian, I am also working on developing other ways for non-Christians to support and be activists too. So, please read this in THAT context in mind.)
With that explained, here is the P.A.V.E. post from Aug. 20, 2008.
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Hello fellow Members,
I just wanted to take this moment to commend everyone here for doing the real action of supporting this very difficult fight for our freedom. Your financial support is so critical, and very much appreciated.
I also want to use this opportunity to make a quick off-the-cuff explanation for anyone who may need it when encountering anyone else who is not yet a TruthBearer.org Member. Namely, the money issue. Members here know what we are about, but sometimes it might be difficult to articulate why money is involved. This is information to help anyone who might need it when speaking with non-Members who wonder about the money issue. Because it is quickly written off-the-cuff, please forgive me for any typos, grammar, or mistakes I make in this. I am trying to communicate a lot of information in one quick post. I pray it be a blessing.
Yes, years ago, we used to have a freebie list called "FAF" - Friends and Fellowhelpers. What we found, though, is that not only can nothing get done that way, but we end up not having the resources to take action when critical moments occur. While we were indeed raising money then too, the people who join freebie lists at any time simply do not provide commitment that they will be there when the time is needed. So, to prevent our time from being wasted by those who are not willing to demonstrate commitment, we were forced to move the freebie FAF to this Members-only list.
Consequently, it provided a safe place for real polygamists to communicate without being exposed to those who have not demonstrated at least the commitment of membership.
As for raising money, we have two key reasons for that.
One, costs have to be covered. We cannot expect those who provide us with the services we need to just give it to us. That is reality. Waiting for the possibility of uncommitted donations does not cut it when the bills are demanding to be paid no matter what. So we have to raise the money to cover those costs. Cashflow has to be reliable. It's reality.
And when money has to be spent, we have to be ready to spend it. We can't say, "Oh wait! We'll pay this later after we ask people to maybe donate to us, ok?"
When polygamists among us were legally persecuted and were blind-sided with enormous legal fees, we could not say, "Sorry attorneys, other Christians say we would be evil to raise money for the family, so you'll have to work for nothing." When the $2,000 in expenses were needed to make the John Stossel 20/20 project possible (in addition to the costs ABC picked up), we could not say to the suppliers, "Sorry, other Christians say that our raising the funds to pay you makes us money-grubbers." When the FLDS news cycle hit [i.e., the Texas raid], we could not tell the vendors of the various expenses totaling $5,000 that we had to pay, "Sorry vendors, other Christians say Mark Henkel is only trying to make money for himself, so you'll have to let us get our message out for free."
Obviously, other people require us to pay them when we need their services, so we have to have that cashflow as needed.
Two, it is also necessary for developing real activists. I am developing this as a new concept, called my P.A.V.E. system of leadership development. Right now, it is in a quick rough draft stage right here, but this should be able to still communicate the point I am trying to make.
P is for Priority.
If polygamy rights is a Priority for someone, it is reflected in their economic choices. For only $79.95 per six months at TruthBearer.org, that comes down to less than $14 a month. [For only $89.99 per six months at the multi/non-religious 2Wives.com personals site supporting the fight too, that comes down to less than $15 a month.] If it's a priority to have freedom, then a person's economic choice will reflect that by doing whatever it takes to come up with that. No excuses. No "excusitis" either. Not because of money for money sake, but because it is a reflection of Priority. After all, $14 a month is not all that out of reach. If it is, then the person should not even being paying even for internet access, because they must truly be that poor.
A is for Accountability.
When a person has put money "on the line," they are more likely to "behave themselves." Who wants to pay money for membership only to be removed from the list for "bad behavior?" It also provides the organization with a way of proving that the identity of a member is not playing multiple personalities.
V is for Value.
This is a verb, that you actionably VALUE what you want, have, and do. You get what you pay for. If you pay nothing, you do not value it. Excluding salvation, relationship, and state of mind, little else is truly both financially free and also having value. (If I have forgotten something in my list of exceptions, I am open to any valid addition! :-) In this organization, we value what we do here, and we expect activists to see it as a value too, to VALUE (as a verb) what we do.
E is for Example.
Leadership by example. If an activist would ever consider to one day be leading others, then they must lead by example. If they are not willing to commit to the first three parts of this (i.e., Priority, Accountability, Value), then how can they ever expect anyone else to follow their leadership? A few years back, [a fellow Member on the list] humbled me profoundly when he made quite the comment, saying that any Member would have to be a Member for something like 100s and 100s of YEARS before they could come close to what my family has paid and sacrificed for Christian Polygamy. I have no expectation that anyone pay anywhere near that price, of course. The point is not about issues of greatness, but rather of setting an example for authority. I am not asking anyone else to pay or sacrifice anything more than what I myself have done - that is the point. If I have paid 6-figures in sacrifice, am I really asking too much to ask others to commit to as little as under $14 a month? (That's the point [the Member] was making when [they] said it.) Authority in our cause can only come when one has paid a committed price too. So, in seeking to give opportunity to promote leadership growth in others, I believe it is important for anyone aspiring to leadership to grow in setting their own example of sacrifice to their own capability.
Priority.
Accountability.
Value.
Example.
This is to P.A.V.E. the way for others growing in leadership.
In closing, I also have two little comments that need to be added too,
First, our organization's main site offers volumes of freely available information, including an entire book. So, it can not be said that we only charge to teach. Rather, we raise money, create a safe environment, weed out the hostile people, and develop activists and leadership.
Second, it also cannot be said that we are cold-hearted to those who hit temporary "hard times." When a proven Member has made themselves known over a long time, and they have truly done VALUABLE things to help the organization even beyond Membership fees, if they hit such a "hard time," and we know it, we have been very open to finding ways to help them stay involved. So, any accusation that we supposedly reject people simply because of money is also fallacious. If someone is really committed and actively helping us for quite some time, we have been very accommodating. If someone is just a lurker, though, who hits a "hard time," then we have no way of knowing who they are, and we obviously can not "finance" what could be an anti-polygamist trying to get free membership.
So, you see, with all this off-the-cuff explanation, that's why I so VALUE (as a verb) each Member here indeed! Each of you have self-selected yourselves as committed fellowhelpers in this very difficult fight indeed! You have separated yourself from those who simply "flap their gums" (as those who know me know I always put it, LOL). By your financial support as TruthBearer.org members, YOU have taken action so that WE can take action in this fight for our lives.
So, I commend, praise, and thank each and every one. You are a true blessing indeed.
==================================================
Sometimes, people wonder why the "money issue" is so important to real activism. A year and a half ago on August 20 (the day after Polygamy Day 8), I made a post in the TruthBearer.org organization for all the fellow paying Members. While its content was specifically addressed to the Members who are Christian Polygamists (so everyone here should read this while understanding that context), the message of its content can apply across all forms of polygamy rights supporters. That is, even for non-Christian Facebook Fans here, the concept of this P.A.V.E. system still applies for all real activists, even if not from the specifically Christian perspective. (So even if you are not a Christian, please do read the overall message of this piece within the context of all support and activism overall, even beyond Christian Polygamy. In addition to the community's 2Wives.com way and the Pro-Polygamy.NET way to support without being a Christian, I am also working on developing other ways for non-Christians to support and be activists too. So, please read this in THAT context in mind.)
With that explained, here is the P.A.V.E. post from Aug. 20, 2008.
==================================================
The money issue - to P.A.V.E. the way
Hello fellow Members,
I just wanted to take this moment to commend everyone here for doing the real action of supporting this very difficult fight for our freedom. Your financial support is so critical, and very much appreciated.
I also want to use this opportunity to make a quick off-the-cuff explanation for anyone who may need it when encountering anyone else who is not yet a TruthBearer.org Member. Namely, the money issue. Members here know what we are about, but sometimes it might be difficult to articulate why money is involved. This is information to help anyone who might need it when speaking with non-Members who wonder about the money issue. Because it is quickly written off-the-cuff, please forgive me for any typos, grammar, or mistakes I make in this. I am trying to communicate a lot of information in one quick post. I pray it be a blessing.
Yes, years ago, we used to have a freebie list called "FAF" - Friends and Fellowhelpers. What we found, though, is that not only can nothing get done that way, but we end up not having the resources to take action when critical moments occur. While we were indeed raising money then too, the people who join freebie lists at any time simply do not provide commitment that they will be there when the time is needed. So, to prevent our time from being wasted by those who are not willing to demonstrate commitment, we were forced to move the freebie FAF to this Members-only list.
Consequently, it provided a safe place for real polygamists to communicate without being exposed to those who have not demonstrated at least the commitment of membership.
As for raising money, we have two key reasons for that.
One, costs have to be covered. We cannot expect those who provide us with the services we need to just give it to us. That is reality. Waiting for the possibility of uncommitted donations does not cut it when the bills are demanding to be paid no matter what. So we have to raise the money to cover those costs. Cashflow has to be reliable. It's reality.
And when money has to be spent, we have to be ready to spend it. We can't say, "Oh wait! We'll pay this later after we ask people to maybe donate to us, ok?"
When polygamists among us were legally persecuted and were blind-sided with enormous legal fees, we could not say, "Sorry attorneys, other Christians say we would be evil to raise money for the family, so you'll have to work for nothing." When the $2,000 in expenses were needed to make the John Stossel 20/20 project possible (in addition to the costs ABC picked up), we could not say to the suppliers, "Sorry, other Christians say that our raising the funds to pay you makes us money-grubbers." When the FLDS news cycle hit [i.e., the Texas raid], we could not tell the vendors of the various expenses totaling $5,000 that we had to pay, "Sorry vendors, other Christians say Mark Henkel is only trying to make money for himself, so you'll have to let us get our message out for free."
Obviously, other people require us to pay them when we need their services, so we have to have that cashflow as needed.
Two, it is also necessary for developing real activists. I am developing this as a new concept, called my P.A.V.E. system of leadership development. Right now, it is in a quick rough draft stage right here, but this should be able to still communicate the point I am trying to make.
P is for Priority.
If polygamy rights is a Priority for someone, it is reflected in their economic choices. For only $79.95 per six months at TruthBearer.org, that comes down to less than $14 a month. [For only $89.99 per six months at the multi/non-religious 2Wives.com personals site supporting the fight too, that comes down to less than $15 a month.] If it's a priority to have freedom, then a person's economic choice will reflect that by doing whatever it takes to come up with that. No excuses. No "excusitis" either. Not because of money for money sake, but because it is a reflection of Priority. After all, $14 a month is not all that out of reach. If it is, then the person should not even being paying even for internet access, because they must truly be that poor.
A is for Accountability.
When a person has put money "on the line," they are more likely to "behave themselves." Who wants to pay money for membership only to be removed from the list for "bad behavior?" It also provides the organization with a way of proving that the identity of a member is not playing multiple personalities.
V is for Value.
This is a verb, that you actionably VALUE what you want, have, and do. You get what you pay for. If you pay nothing, you do not value it. Excluding salvation, relationship, and state of mind, little else is truly both financially free and also having value. (If I have forgotten something in my list of exceptions, I am open to any valid addition! :-) In this organization, we value what we do here, and we expect activists to see it as a value too, to VALUE (as a verb) what we do.
E is for Example.
Leadership by example. If an activist would ever consider to one day be leading others, then they must lead by example. If they are not willing to commit to the first three parts of this (i.e., Priority, Accountability, Value), then how can they ever expect anyone else to follow their leadership? A few years back, [a fellow Member on the list] humbled me profoundly when he made quite the comment, saying that any Member would have to be a Member for something like 100s and 100s of YEARS before they could come close to what my family has paid and sacrificed for Christian Polygamy. I have no expectation that anyone pay anywhere near that price, of course. The point is not about issues of greatness, but rather of setting an example for authority. I am not asking anyone else to pay or sacrifice anything more than what I myself have done - that is the point. If I have paid 6-figures in sacrifice, am I really asking too much to ask others to commit to as little as under $14 a month? (That's the point [the Member] was making when [they] said it.) Authority in our cause can only come when one has paid a committed price too. So, in seeking to give opportunity to promote leadership growth in others, I believe it is important for anyone aspiring to leadership to grow in setting their own example of sacrifice to their own capability.
Priority.
Accountability.
Value.
Example.
This is to P.A.V.E. the way for others growing in leadership.
In closing, I also have two little comments that need to be added too,
First, our organization's main site offers volumes of freely available information, including an entire book. So, it can not be said that we only charge to teach. Rather, we raise money, create a safe environment, weed out the hostile people, and develop activists and leadership.
Second, it also cannot be said that we are cold-hearted to those who hit temporary "hard times." When a proven Member has made themselves known over a long time, and they have truly done VALUABLE things to help the organization even beyond Membership fees, if they hit such a "hard time," and we know it, we have been very open to finding ways to help them stay involved. So, any accusation that we supposedly reject people simply because of money is also fallacious. If someone is really committed and actively helping us for quite some time, we have been very accommodating. If someone is just a lurker, though, who hits a "hard time," then we have no way of knowing who they are, and we obviously can not "finance" what could be an anti-polygamist trying to get free membership.
So, you see, with all this off-the-cuff explanation, that's why I so VALUE (as a verb) each Member here indeed! Each of you have self-selected yourselves as committed fellowhelpers in this very difficult fight indeed! You have separated yourself from those who simply "flap their gums" (as those who know me know I always put it, LOL). By your financial support as TruthBearer.org members, YOU have taken action so that WE can take action in this fight for our lives.
So, I commend, praise, and thank each and every one. You are a true blessing indeed.
==================================================
